JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH

ROBERT: Today is Thursday, May 28, 1987, with John and Robert are to meet with Jonathan!

JONATHAN: Well! How are you today!

ROBERT: Very good! Welcome!

JONATHAN: Thank you! side? the other

ROBERT: How have you been on

JONATHAN: You know! Trying to amuse ourself! Oh I had to go here and I had to go there. Then I had this problem solved and that problem to solve and it gets very complicated though and picked up a little here and there. I see that Deborah is upset though! We can try again!

ROBERT: HA! HAI HA!

JONATHAN: Where shall we start! Do you recall some of the area that she was worried about!

ROBERT: The question is that had to do with her new residence! Or else she find a home that is tolerable for conducting her business in.

JONATHAN: We go back to that word tolerable, mansions, palaces, and all the paraphernalia suits one kind of individual. Ah! As I said before it all depends on her energy and her suits her energy and I can only emphasize that she eliminate all this area of problems but I think what needs to be done. Let’s go back to the first question before we go back to the prescription portion. Her definition of tolerable is out of the question at this point in time. It will be less than tolerable! But I think it could be suitable for her needs and we are not talking about an apartment; we are talking about a house. I think that it will come about when it is ready for it. I don’t think that she has to worry about being on the street or collecting garbage or like these little bag ladies do. I don’t think that she has to worry that she will be in that situation. But! I think that she will have to be, shall we say, a little bit tolerable of the situation. I think that she needs desperately to go into herself more and here we 1

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH say meditate. Now! Meditation isn’t easy to do; some people can’t meditate and, in her case, she has a problem in this aspect. I think that she needs desperately to go into herself. Here we say meditation, meditation isn’t that easy to do! Now, some people have to understand that she has to try again and again. Try to cut out the distractions of this and that. I think that she is developing too much on the physical plain and not enough on the physical plain. In order to encompass her being, she has to do this. She has to try to get more in the spiritual realm and she has to get involved in the beneficial vibes of her soul and don’t be so entangled in the non beneficial vibes. What is happing in her case, she is that she trying do it irrationally in the sense that her mind is so quick that it pushes ten feet instead of two inches. And what she needs to do she needs to try to prevent that and she will react too much and she can’t react in this way in a definite point of being and she has to understand that you have to do step by step. Patience, I know the old adage patience is a virtue. We all know that adage but In essence it does pay off and what I think is that what she needs to do meditate, try to cleans some of the old wrong vibes. Rrrrrrrrring, bet that was her, isn’t it! Rrrrrrrrrrrrng

ROBERT: Yes! That is her!

JONATHAN: We continue or what!

ROBERT: Let’s continue!

JONATHAN: Now my thoughts seem to be all confused so you have to give me a moment so that I have to go back to were I was! Poor

DEBORAH: !

JONATHAN: Now we are talking about spiritual development in her and I know in her case that she is going to listen to this or try to direct this to you more personally, Deborah! There was a great need to go beyond the material point of view. I think that you are focusing your mind and all your energy on this point of view. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I think that it is imperative that you don’t do this! Rrrrrrrrrr Rrrrrrrrrrr 2

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH Rrrrrrrrrrrrr

DEBORRAH: Bob! Are you with John right now, I am calling you to remind that my inclusion I know in what John is making for you at this moment! Just to mind you, if you are thank you!

JONATHAN: To resume, I know these little delays that is causing our tapes have little gaps in it but we will continue. And it this whole energy that she need to concentrate upon is essential so that she can understand who she is and in her place in the world, not only as a human being but also as a spiritual being and I think that she has to focus more in this area in order to determine which way that she can proceed and realize as persistent as she is that she mighty not comprehend what we are going to discuss and an prescription for eliminating some of these problems, she has to understand that there are that there are certain pathways that in order to perceive must be taken to perceive certain things, you cannot rush them by being demanding, by rushing them not understanding what life is about and when we insist on certain things and sometimes we cause bad vibrations to emirate from the source. So, in order to understand what is happening, there are certain things that you must do. Number one, you are a very external person, you must become more internal, you must get in touch with your feelings, get in touch with the inner self, you must cleanse away all the stuff that is in there. Now, we don’t like to categorize people but you yourself know what you are inside of yourself and you are the only one that can do it. You can’t expect anyway else to help you. If you want help, do kit yourself, what I am seeing is that you need lots of work to be done. It should not be news to you at all, you should understand that when we are in ourself that we should be able to understand and estimate and evaluate how we are and what we are going to be or what we are not going to be. Now, you can go to many, many people, you can go to get lots of advice on what you should do. But it boils down to one basic principle and only you can do it and id you want to cleanse yourself, and you want to be a spiritual being, 3

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DE-BORRAH fine this the way that you should go. Number one, once you know where you are going, you want to go to the means beyond. Go to that point or beyond that point, sometimes we forget how we go to that point. Now we know that we want to be a spiritual being but now let us say, give me a moment, let’s talk about meditation first. We’re a person trying to evaluate our soul ow do we go about it? First of all, we know we need the help, so where do we get this help from? If we go inside of ourself there are entities in everyone that are there to help that individual and when we talk about intuition, when we talk about seeing visions, we talk about having impressions, about of being a sense of one in everything that we do, and at this point it is much more benevolent to make an attempt to sit down and meditate. Now, how do you meditate and there are many forms on how to meditate. Bob has given you one form of having you to meditate and others have given you other forms. Well

DEBORAH: , you are not a neophyte in this area. I mean intellectually you have encompassed many, many forms of spirituality but in essence you have to encompass them internally and not externally. I think that you are too externally in a lot of these areas. I think that you have to more internal. AH ! So, If we proceed to meditation. Now the third aspect is that you want to know when you will be able to manifest. Before you manifest anything you have to understand the basics, you have to know what these basics are and how do you find out? All that is internal! I mean the biggest problem that I see is your refusal to go inside yourself because it may be fear or whatever but you have to face fears, fears are things that you have to overcome and you cannot, and I repeat you can’t overcome fears by going away from them or smoothing them over or ignoring them, they are there to be overcome. And if you can do that, then we can talk about manifestation. We can’t talk about manifestation at any point right now and spirituality does not really mean manifestation. Meditation is one little part and not everybody is entitled to that experience. As far as developing to a more beneficial aspect you have to understand that

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH you have to start this process. And you have to start it immediately and this is important to you at this point in time, not to pursue other aspects until you achieve this little aspect of yours. You have to be cleansed, you have to meditate, you have to develop and you have to be aware of where you are. And now I realize that sometimes the financial burden due, encompass humanity and these burdens sometimes seem overwhelming, well as I have said before these burdens are not overwhelming because they are not given to you if they were overwhelming, because they would not be given to you if they were overwhelming to you. And the thing is that I realize that it is very difficult as a human being to determine what these burdens are but these were placed in your path, in fact you have chosen these burdens. You can’t blame other people for the burdens that have come upon because you have chosen as a soul before you have incarnated into this body before you started the pathway through and incarnated the body and the soul enters the body in these aspects you have approved everything that has happened so that you cannot say that these things are acted upon. You are not a passive individual and this does not only pertain to you but this is a general statement and because we are active people and we decide beforehand what our life is going to be and the guidelines that was going to be, but of course we leave free will and you decide what you want to do and at what point. Now for me to develop the whole essence of this dialog to help you. As I have told you that you have to develop on a spiritual level. And if I can predict that you are going to get a hundred thousand dollars and that would not be true, or that you are going to get a fabulous job doing something and have a steady income. That would that prove, it wouldn’t prove anything. The thing right now in order for you to have the financial stability that you seek; you need spiritual stability and the only wat that you need spiritual stability is to start right now. As far as the deadline of June 8th something will happen before that time in order to alleviate your situation. But it is not what you want and 5

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH this is something that will have to accept. But get what you want at this point in time, you will get something which is comparably suitable for your needs or suitable for your family’s needs but you are not going to be into a situation where you can afford for the luxury which you have accustomed to. As far as money and the job for you, you have to work on it. Nothing comes easy but you have to put out the positive energy, you have to develop it, you have to work on it. In your sometimes you have of getting apprehensive and lackadaisical, even though you are a really hard worker, sometimes you get the first bite of the pie you sort of lay back and say that you don’t want any more and you cause your life a little disharmony. What you need to due through the principles of meditation and spiritualization, you need to generate positive energy in these areas so that you would have the ambition to go forward and pursue your career. As it is as we all know this is not being done. And you say why can’t I get this and why can’t I get that. Because you are putting enough positive energy in and you are not depositing in so many ways that it has not been beneficial to you. Yu know that this situation in this New Zealand concept and the other situation that you have been involved with! What is his name over there? That has to stop! And I think that you have to understand that you are here for a purpose and you are not fulfilling that purpose right now and you are causing a lot of calamity in your life. That is complicating everything in your life and that is causing you to have burdens that you normally would not had if you wound normally been involved in these situations. Now you have to be honest and you have to be sincere and what you need to be is to be honest with yourself. You have to understand who you are and what you are doing and understand how it is to be benevolent to oneself and understand how it is to be benevolent to others. You have to develop more positive energy and with this more positive energy I can’t reemphasize this more and more enough. I can’t reemphasize it enough and I can’t reemphasize it all enough and things are, I am just seeing such chaos and the reasons 6

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH for the chaos is because you are confused. And I think that we have to see clarity, you have to seek the stone. It is good to go into certain elements of spirituality on a material level because that develops into internal spirituality but just like a crystal you have to start it. You have to polish it, you have to develop it and before it can give you benevolence, you have to be benevolent. You have to have the seed and I know that you do have the seed. I know that deep down in you thit you can be benevolent but you have to be benevolent to everyone. You have to be benevolent to your soul; you have to be benevolent to strangers. You have to be honest to yourself and you have to be a good person. And you have heard this before and I now that I am not the first and I expect that I am not the last and sometimes we can’t hear things enough and sometimes our patience gets a little weary so that you have to understand that there are certain things that you have to do to generate good well and this good will is not being generated. I don’t understand to put it bluntly why the instance on certain elements can being constantly being eroded. I don’t understand why an answer cannot be accepted. I mean that you are not going to get what you want at this point in time and I think that it is time to put away your trivial toys and start paying attention. And I think that you have a bad habit of losing things off when you don’t like them. You have to stop doing this, you have to take the good with the bad and you can’t say that the universe owes me anything. The universe doesn’t owe you anything. Nobody owes you anything, you ow yourself something and that something is a kernel that has to be developed. I don’t understand why you just frustrate people that way, when you shouldn’t frustrate them that way, you should be more benevolent. As I have said before you have to take that mind away from your soul. You have been generating mentally and not enough spiritually. In order for you to understand what this is, I think you should go and enjoy what life is but on a spiritual manner. And I feel that you are not doing this, I don’t know and I want to try to explain this but sometimes it is really difficult

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH for me to explain things. It seems as though trying to- do it on a human level isn’t very appropriate at this time but as I have told you before we can communicate internally and this is something that you have to do. You have to go and meditate! You have to seek me out! You have to try to understand that I am with you but I will not be with you unless you seek me out! And not only me, but there are also other entities that help you a lot. And you have your Guardian and your guardian is desperately starving, thar person is so starving for contact. You haven’t contacted that person; you have to contact your guardian and that person will be much more benevolent and bring better vibes towards you and I really don’t understand your stubbiness in this area. Deborrah we all love you; your brother loves you; John loves you; all your children loves you; all these entities love you but you seem to shut everybody off! You can’t do this, you have to comprehend that you have to open up, open up spiritually and develop that kernel that you so much seek. You desperately want it, why aren’t you doing it because your mind gets in your way, your ego gets in your way, the forces that are preventing you from developing yourself. And I believe that you need to pursue this area dramatically. Now, if you don’t mind, I think that John needs a drink!

JONATHAN: started drinking the glass of water! Ah! that felt good! Deborrah, please understand we are not against you! We are with you; we are trying to understand you! We are trying to help you! Please be more cooperative, please try not to be a nuisance to other people! Please develop yourself! I know that you have a great love for your children but remember children grow up and entities depart just as you have split off, so they are going to split off! I think that you are energizing, I am not saying not to be a good mother! I think you can be a good mother but I think that you dominate your children too much! And this is something that you have to do. You have to let them go! You have 8

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH to let them have their freedom because they have to develop their own lives because think they have to develop themselves in that area. So, I am not saying don’t be a good mother and I said that before but you have o give them their freedom because they in turn have their goals that have to be accomplished and they have to develop along their lines. I think that there is too much restraint and you have fear of being alone and you try to like a hen cuddling her chicks. When the chicks become a hen, but you cannot cuddle them any more in that manner. You have to understand that you have to give them more but don’t dominate them so much, and you have to give love and understanding and you have to give them a way of developing themselves in such a manner that they can respond to you and not look upon you as mother. They have to look upon you as an individual even though you are a parent and you play that parent role; I think that you are too much ofa parent. And maybe his has to go back to your own childhood or whatever! But I think you have to develop along those lines, because I think there is too much control of your children and may be harmfully preventing them from developing spiritually the way that they should be because as the old saying goes that you have too much baloney in the sandwich, no one is going to eat it. And I think that in that in this case, that is an old German saying by the way, that was supposed to be laughable.

ROBERT: HA!

JONATHAN: I think that the control, there is too much energy in that aspect! As far as your job goes and we go back and forth because of these thoughts that are happening. It is so much difficult out there, it is like picking grapes off the vine. You know that you get more than you want and sometimes there hard to assimilate into the material plane. But as I was saying that to know your job here I don’t, give me a moment I see friction and there is something about your job where you have been having troubles with your job recently and it seems as though you have been ion personages or personnel or people that are 9

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORAH associated with you. And I think that you have to understand and smooth those differences out. Because I think that righty you have a very beneficial position and you are not doing well in your businesses because you are not dealing in the proper channels, it goes back to the same point of spiritual guidance. If you were better in spiritual guidance your financial aspects will develop on a greater level. But what I am seeing at this point that there are areas in your job where you have to smooth out and these may be on the client level and they may not be that is not coming through right now! I just feel the friction between you and other people in the career aspect, so I think that you have to smooth out your career a little bit more. And I don’t think that you should just jump into another job because I think that you will just be causing more havoc. So, I think that you have to stabilize yourself on the job plane and try to understand what you are doing at this point. Now, as far as the house is concerned and you will have a house, I see a house quite plainly. It is not the one you wanted but it is close to the ocean and I see that it is sort of white and it is not a palace. It has sufficient room for your family and I see a fireplace and I see good vibes in this house and you will get it in a view days. And I think that you will understand what we are attempting to do and I am trying to say that what I think that what we have to do, which is sort of pushing you and I know that you don’t think to be pushed. But we are pushing you because of our love for you, our concern for you, and we are trying to push you to save you, this entity of yours because what you are doing is devastating us, it is causing us great pain. It is causing us this reparable harm. I think that you need to understand more or that how should I say it, that by hurting yourself, you are hurting me and you are hurting other people. And all these other people have a stake in your life because we are part of you at one point in time and we have invested in you. You have to understand that these things need to be developed and they need to be understood and you have to have some direction. 10

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORAH And if you continue this, then I might as well give up because how can I handled this, of all my different cases you are causing me a problem. You know, I expected that you would be an easy case for me but at the point turns out you are being a very difficult case. And I am using words at this time that may not make sense at this time. It is really difficult to communicate in this body, number one and this realm, number two but in order for us to understand what you are doing to us, I think that you have to understand that sometimes negative energy can be turned around and in your case, I see a lot of negative energy is being dissipated and I want you to understand that participation is not necessary and it is harmful because where does this negativity go? It goes someplace where does it go and sometimes it is going to hurt innocent people and other times it will go to the universe and you don’t know where it is going to end up there. It can go into a different reality all this negative energy and you have to understand that you are a creative being. You create things your thoughts are creations, your mind is a creation and if you are creating all this negativity and dispersing into the universe, than it has to land someplace. Now! We have to stop this negativity and we have to stop it from going into the universe and harming some poor naive innocent soul, that is not used to this negativity. So, I think that instead of blaming people, blaming things, if you could just be a little more positive in your attitudes, understand yourself a little bit more and try to achieve some kindness. I think that you need a little more kindness in your life, think that you need to be a person that doesn’t have to react as you do. So, you react quite a bit! What are all these defensives about? What are you doing? What are going with all this, you are like a warrior? All knives and the blades and the swords are bum, um boom! What are you doing? There is no need for that! What are you doing! What you need to do is be more patient, be kind, be understanding, be benevolent, be a nice person, and am nor saying that you are nt nice, I think that you are such a benevolent 11

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH person but, in this material, form you have to more than what you are, right now! Now, who determines that? I have nothing to do with it! In that aspect you determine your own goals and your own objectives. And my relationship here ids because of our relationshipfrom, the past where we were formed from the same entity at one point in our lives. By one point in our lives I mean in the realm of infinity not in the materialistic incarnation but we have a connection but that does not mean that I am totally obligated to you in this aspect and I don’t want to sound cruel facetious or whatever but the responsibility is yours. It is not mine, I am trying to help you as much as I can and that is one of the reasons that I am here doing this setup here. This is not a movie set and we are not trying to develop some Dynesty or some other program that you people enjoy around here or the trials and the tribulations about some family here. To put it this way, Deborrah we need to help reach other and you have helped me in the past which may be the present and the past. I know that it is very difficult to understand and it is very complicated because we have to think of things that happen at the same time and not at times in one aspect or another. As past, present and future exist at the same time, the only place that time means anything is here in your materialistic world but let’s go further and say I am deeply concerned and I am worried And even though I guess we don’t fear, I haven’t experienced it in this realm anywhere, I am afraid that you are going to be a disappointment to me and all we have invested in. You feel that this is the only life that I have and have your logic and your brain try to justify why you are here. But you know better deep down inside of you and sometimes you use it a crutch because you don’t because you go to your way and use your logic that is a crutch and say boom, boom, boom. Well, that doesn’t satisfy you inside of yourself and you know that and I know that! So, if we want to do anything in life, if we want to develop, if we want to succeed, if we want to go through the processes of spiritualization and if you don’t want 12

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH reincarnate time and time again, following the same path as you are following right now and I am really distraught over this whole situation and I would like you to try to be patient, try to be understand, try to be more loveable in everything, you go out and you don’t pay attention to the trees, and the trees are very benevolent creatures and sometimes they cannot be benevolent but let’s see, why can’t you for a little bit go into a meadow or some tree laden place and meditate and if you don’t want to close yours, don’t close your eyes, why don’t you focus on a tree and understand what a tree is and feel the presence of the tree and understand that a one time that they were worshipped as deities which they can be. And try to understand where the try came from and try to feel the tree. Smell the tree, then feel it spiritually, feel the focus of the tree, feel the focus in the dirt and the roots and see how kit clings to Mother Earth. Feel all those things, get your hands dirty a bit! Those hands dirty, feel the moistness of Mother Earth and brush it up against the side of the bark, the side the trunk, and feel the tree and then go to the branches and feel the leaves and feel how they breathe and how they breathe, and expand and breathe and it is like a deposit of the oak tree and branches out to the many aspects of the world. I don’t know Deborrah, you give me the desire to be more patient, give me the desire to understand who I am, and you try my soul but I can remember the more benevolent parts of you, I can remember more succulent attributes that you encompassed at one time in another reality, and sometimes this materialization seems to tarnish that image that I remember you. Deborrah, we got to start working together again, and we have to understand everything we have about ourselves, we have to know our faults, we have to eliminate those faults, we have to begin the process of spiritualization and I think that we have to understand who and what we are, instead of developing into a insensible reactionary individual. And sometimes I know that I am repeating myself and I know that sometimes get redundant but let us 13

JONATHAN: ‘S JOURNALS SESSION #5 ON MAY 28, 1987, WITH JOHN ROBERT & DEBORRAH see if we can give you something to focus on. How about just closing your eyes and see afield of blue and having a pink petal, a pink flower like a petunia, pink and luscious, soft, delicate, sweet and you see the yellow pistons in the flower, bright and golden against the pink petals. Think of the flower, think of it soothing you, think of eliminating the frustrations that you feel, the reactions just see looking at the flower, The flower starts to rotates and as it rotates it better and better, more soothing, more understanding and your frustrations begin to diminish and your worries seem to be divine and you feel more peace, peace and quite as it flower goes so slowly, oh so slowly and it is starting to rotate a little more and a little more and a little more and rotates a little more and rotates slowly and slowly, now with each breath you feel the rotation, feel the breath and feel the rotation, see how slowly, and slowly, and slowly an soothing and giving off light. This light is white and it streams from the petal and it is soothing your soul and developing your soul and it is getting stronger. 14